Milfs of Faith?

Nationwide arena is beset with a ‘Women of Faith’ convention for this weekend, which I’m sure has all the area bars ready to cash in on the influx of fresh meat populating their happy hours. Ok, maybe with the Catholics anyways. Or maybe not.

Anyhow, I’m generally distrustful of organized religious events like this but hey, who am I to judge someone else’s happiness? To each his own as long as they’re not banging on my front door asking for money. . .or worse, trying to ‘save me’.

“Friend, have you found Jesus?”
“Why no, is he lost? I mean the dude has his own GPS, right? Does he owe you money?”

Ah yes, Fundamentalists can be such a humorless lot. A generalization, I know – but it HAS been my experience. Kinda makes me want to sit outside the arena, and catcall groups of the faithful as they walk by in their Sunday best. Hey, religious women need love too, don’t they? Nothing like getting them all steamed up before they have to go sit for hours in a room crowded full of fanatical devotees, singing Disney-like choruses while voting on how much sex to give out (or not) to their men for the rest of the year. That’s what they discuss, isn’t it? Don’t suppose they have any kind of bikini competition or anything, do they? Probably not. Probably just as well.

Ok, ok – I’m just kidding. I don’t need to get attacked by a vigilante arm of the Red Hat society. My luck, I’d end up on the evening news – something about an impromptu exorcism being performed on an middle-aged derelict in the Arena district. Wouldn’t be pretty, no sir.

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